6-6:10pm. Narrate your day… tell us a story from today…
6:10-6:30pm: Your personal essay/story… share some paragraphs with us?
6:30-6:50pm: What are some of the more exiting dimensions to writing about yourself? Some of the challenges?
6:50-7pm: Without spoiling anything in your story, what do you want readers to leave with? That is, what do you intend on teaching them? What do you want your readers to do when done reading your writing?
7-7:07pm: BREAK
7:07-7:20pm: Samantha Irby…. Thoughts? Passages from her book that had you laughing, or LEARNING?
7:20-7:30: Describe her mood, attitude….
7:30-7:50pm: OPEN MIC
7:50-8pm: Close, tonight’s page…. Positive beats…..
HW: Final Draft of your story, keep reading Irby and type a reaction to her (wherever you are in the book…)…. Journal entries, be prepared to share next meeting.
#professormikey 
Hey everyone, I hope all of you are staying healthy and sane! Today was pretty typical. I woke up, did yoga, repotted some of my plants, read Samantha Irby, and sat in the sun for a bit. Same old considering everything this has been my quarantine routine. I’ve been listening to “April She Will Come” on repeat today and it makes me feel all bubbly inside. So, to describe my day in one singular word: warm. I miss you all!
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Love the energy in this little jot, Harmony!! Welcome!! Nice to see you and your words. Enjoy the discussion!!
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This sounds really nice! I could picture your day!
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Hello class!
I hope you all are doing well.
My day was interesting to say the least. I had a doctors appt. at Kaiser. There were so many check points to even get in to the building. Honestly it’s probably one of the cleanest and safest places right now. Another bonus was I actually found parking. What made this interesting was the fact that my doctor and most of her staff seems to think the measures we are taking are over kill. She said it’s good to protect those who are most vulnerable, but at the same time, there are so many other things that are negatively affected, she’s not sure what is worse. For example, they are not performing cancer screenings, mammograms, colonoscopies and other disease finding and preventative services. She says that there are surely people who will have lasting health affects due to the fear of coming to the doctors for something they should. This was just a small part of our conversation, but it solidified the questions and wondering I have about media and government hype with all this. I know… I sound like I need a tin foil hat. Our family is following the “rules” …but I am starting to ask why?
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Lot of uncertain right now, for sure..
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That’s so very strange, everything feels so backwards lately!
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Yeah, I feel very torn and confused.
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Many do…
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Today I spent some time finishing up my story real quick. I had a whole lot more to say than I was expecting and accidentally got about 3000 words down by the end of it. I think though that the length for an assignment like this one comes quite a bit easier than with others. Its easy to get wrapped up in yourself. Other than that i did not really do a whole lot and I think I’m experiencing a deficit of vitamin d. I actually had to finish another research essay for another class today, so didn’t really get to go out. Haven’t checked the weather, but hopefully it’s sunny tomorrow. I plan on staring directly at ultraviolet if possible.
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Welcome, Jacob. Glad you’re here..
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So true!!
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I feel the same, I am starting to turn into a vampire. I should get outside more lol.
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The air, the sun… very beneficial to the character, and the story.
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I completely agree
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I don’t think it’s a bad thing that writing about yuorself came more naturally. It did for me too. I think it is because, what do we know more than ourselves? Nothing. I went for seven pages and probably could have done 10. Tomorrow is supposed to be a warm one!
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Nice!!! The writing obviously loved you back!!!
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Hey everyone! My day was good. A story from today: my sister Maddie and I went to my friends house for her birthday, six feet apart of course, and while we were there Maddie’s old crush pulled up with his sister. Funny thing is that Maddie and I named our car after this boy (Niko), and we have a huge sticker on our car that says “I’ve got 99 problems but Niko ain’t one”. We showed it to him and told him we named our car after him and I think he was a little bit weirded out because we haven’t seen him for over a year! Because Maddie no longer has a crush on him we could finally tell him about Niko the car.
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Nice little story and character development here!
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damn…I feel outed lol
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hahahaha. The sister comment made this.
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This is so funny! I could imagine the car and showing him lol
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That’s what took me, as well..
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Hi everybody! I’m excited about class tonight. I finally figured out the direction I want to go in with my paper and I’m ready to get back into the writing this week.
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What helped you figure it out?
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I just kept writing until something sounded right! Something I don’t think I would’ve tried before taking this class
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Feels amazing to find your written self, then write it down.
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For tonight’s page….. Pace is peace in your paragraphs.
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Mine and my fiancé’s anniversary is next week. So i have been reminiscing.
I’m going to be single the rest of my life. I told myself I’d be single forever. I was busy working on myself and taking care of my kids. A friend told me to sign up on a dating website. It was a total bust. So to my surprise, a friend or more of an acquaintance of mine, C messaged me on Facebook, telling me he liked my pictures. Huh? That’s odd. I didn’t put any new pictures on social media. I sent the obligatory, thank you. Passing some time on my dating app, the app rated him out to show that he looked at my profile. This guy had a girlfriend! What an ass. So I messaged him and asked what he was doing on a dating app. “Don’t you have a girlfriend?” “No. We broke up. Don’t you have a husband”? Touché. So we chatted for the next week or so. We talked about our likes and dislikes. We got to know each other a little better. He finally asked me out. I was hesitant because I knew his ex-girlfriend. So I called to ask her if it would be alright we went out? It won’t turn in to anything serious I told her. She was elated. (See, she ended up dating C’s best friend. HA! She wanted all 4 of us to hang out. A little more than awkward.)Anyways, I swore off relationships. Dinner. A night out. Good company. I was fine with that. Most men see single mom’s as wounded deer.
Our first date. I was living with my mom. I did not want her to know I was going on a date with C. I told him to park down the street and call me when he got there. I’d meet him at the corner. That fool showed up to my momma’s door, KNOCKED and had a bouquet of roses with him! Strike 1. Can’t even follow directions. Resistance. I felt it in my soul. He is very handsome. A gentleman and a charmer when he’s trying to woo his new lady.
Our first date in public with other couples was for Valentine’s Day. We went to Taco Bell and watched Fifty Shades of Grey in the movie theaters. He apologized for the Taco Bell because he had to pay his mortgage and was broke. I was broke too. Trying to save up money to move out of my mom’s house and pay attorney fees. I didn’t care. It took the pressure off and we had a great time. I snuck some beer in the theaters for the movie. (Something C has never done. WHAAAAT?) I don’t know what I got myself into. What a square. The lady next to us hears us bantering and beer bottles clinking. She smiles and asks how long we’ve been together. I answer first “Oh noooooo, we are just dating. Like a month now. I don’t want a relationship.” She snickers, turns to the man on her left and tells me “I said the same thing. We’ll be married 15 years next month. You guys are cute together.” So I handed her a beer and hoped she didn’t just put a curse on me.
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Great world you create here in this “reminiscing”…
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Haha thats an awesome story! All your stories are enjoyable and funny to read 🙂
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Thank you!
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I’m a fan as well!
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This sounds like a pretty good first page out of some kind of memoir. Like something Lawson would write about Victor. Haha do what you will with that!
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Our whole relationship is a comedy! I definitely think he gives me good material. Thank you for the kind words!
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Aww Simone this story was very cute and freaking funny. Loving reading your writing!!
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Last night I cleaned half of my room and did all my laundry and I feel way to proud of myself. Time seems to be passing really fast yet super slow, and I can probably partly attribute that to my habit of ignoring my math homework and my binge- watching of the show Criminal Minds. It is so entertaining yet so unrealistic. I wrote a lot recently, trying to improve my story, but there is a lot more work to do and things I want to completely change. I just checked on the bird nest and one of the babies looks like its about to take its first flying lesson. I didn’t know baby birds could grow that fast, that one in particular must have been hogging all of the worms though because his brother is still tiny and bald. Anyways, I hope the rest of you are well. Happy Wednesday.
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Production comes in many forms!!
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I completely understand the proud feeling you had after cleaning half your room and doing laundry. I did something yesterday and it was a mood booster.
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Me and you both! I have been procrastinating my math homework for the past two weeks but finally got around to it this morning. Cant say the same about my bedroom though, looks like a tornado went through it.
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Can’t blame you, it’s Math.
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Today has been ok, I guess. I don’t know. I didn’t do much. It was my friend’s birthday and I got to see her so that was nice. Writing my story this week was a little hard, focusing this week has been a struggle. I am so tired all of the time and most nights I can’t sleep. But, I loved Irby’s book and I am excited about tonight’s class.
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Ms. Irby is wonderful.. freeing, antsy, and charming!!
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oh I agree, I finished her books within hours, loved every second of her charm and wit.
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Did you finish the book already? I’m about 1/3 through it. I was skeptical at first, but I really enjoy her as an author!
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What qualities of her writing do you enjoy?
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I like her rawness. She is so damn sarcastic and straight forward. She cuts through the bullshit and tells it like it is. Hilarious. I appreciate the honesty
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this past week I have read at least five different books. I have tried to put down my phone more and read. I love escaping. Irby’s book, I agree, I was skeptical, I can not really relate to her as I am 16 and has barely lived my life. But, I had nothing else to do so I finished the book!
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That’s awesome!!
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I am 1/3 through too and I really am enjoying it!!
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I DIED when she was talking about crapping herself on the side of the road. I am a huge fan of vulgar and gross humor. But she was so damn nonchalant and unembarrassed by the whole thing?
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Yes, there is a certain ease to her sentences and carelessness in her composition that makes her, frankly, irresistible.
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Hi everyone, hope everyones well. Today I woke up and edited my story write up, then I worked out and got ready for my job orientation. I was nervous… for no reason at all but it all went well and ended earlier than expected. I drove home starving even though I had eaten a couple hours before the orientation. Story of my life… Im constantly hungry. So, now I am overloading on carbs, lifes good:)
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carbs=happiness.
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Very much agree!
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Ha ha.,…. Orientation for….?
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Whole foods! Just working to save up for a car before college
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Felt motivated today ran three miles before seven am. Did an ab work out then took a shower. I started to review my email and got ready for my 9 am zoom session. I was in a two-hour teacher appreciation meeting that made me feel proud to be able to call my high school teacher my colleges now. (happy teacher appreciation week Mike). After that, I worked with four different students and finished zooming at two pm. I got to finally eat and reasonably, I ate a whole medium pizza while reading, We Are Never Meeting in Real Life.
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wow, three miles, you go girl!
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wow sounds like a very productive day!
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Thanks, Karen!!! Good to feel good, and productive… alive!! Cheers!!
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Woop!!! Get it girl!
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I am seriously applauding you for being so productive! Happy teacher appreciation darling:)
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Samantha Irby- so much personality in her humor, like her humor is not just her writing, it is an important part of her.
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hey everyone! hope all is well!
my day was interesting, woke up around 10ish and started my 4 paged rough draft and finished it, afterwards went down to my store to grab something to eat from there and also went to the Indian place next door and got some stuff there as well for dinner. then was talking to one of my close co-workers who just got suspended today for all bs reasons and this is why I hate corporate and corporations in general especially monopolies that you know shouldn’t exist but do and after that headed home and played video games with a different co-worker and that’s what we’ve been doing until about 20 mins ago then now I’m here to participate in class. so overall not a very interesting day, to say the least.
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Look further into your day, and you’ll find more that’s interesting about it!
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Getting suspended during Covid. That’s rough, hope your friend is able to recover and ends up being just fine!
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Same here.
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Hey fellow classmates! I hope everyone is doing well and finding new hobbies to occupy yourselves. My day today was pretty good, I caught up one some homework, watched some Greyś Anatomy. I went on a nice walk on a bike trail, itś finally feeling like summer outside, thank goodness. Now, I am home and ready to finish the rest of the day.
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yes, love Grey’s Anatomy…..McDreamy is the love of my life…
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McDreamy> McSteamy
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RIGHT OMG HE IS SO HANDSOME
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Today I woke up early and thought to myself.. I’m going to be productive today. For three hours I finished all my math homework that I’ve been procrastinating for the past two weeks. I took a trip to Friedman’s Home Improvement to buy some fence boards for two new orders I received for my personalized signs. While I was there I also bought wood to make a small flower box next to the new chicken coop my dad and I built two weeks ago, this was to be a surprise for mom for mother’s day. Picked out some springtime flowers with my brother and went home to start my project. First I spray painted my fence boards black and then I got the electric saw out to cut my pieces of wood for the flower box. After I assembled the flower box, it was time for my favorite part, planting the flowers. I finished the project off with a single coat of white paint just before my mom got home.
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Hey guys! Doing well here. Today has actually been really great. My mom and I walked to a nursery by our house and bought a bunch of new plants to pot! And I also had Chinese food. This doesn’t sound like anything but it’s the most excitement I’ve had for a LONG time!
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Chinese food is always exciting!
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Build on that excitement!
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I am trying to be a plant mom this year but nothing is growing. Any suggestions?
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Helloooooo! I hope you all wonderful people are doing great today!
I’ve spent the past few hours going over certain details of my story and cleaning my room. I had not done laundry in about 2-3 weeks and I am more than ashamed. I’m glad today started off productive and with MUSIC! I have not stopped jamming to my favorite artists since I got up and ready for the day.
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Music always elevates!
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That sounds awesome Nancy, whenever I need to do major cleaning I always play my music on my speaker.
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Your essays… where are they? Some parts you want to share? How are you feeling while writing it?
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There have been some pretty raw parts that got me choked up. Some past stories I told that were pretty raw. I feel good about it. I could probably write a book. This paper is a little snippet that I plan on adding to even after this class is over.
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Follow the emotion, and there will be more for you and your readers.
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I wrote four complete pages with such ease. I was hesitant at first, mostly because this isn’t the type of writing I’m comfortable with. However I am so very happy with what I’ve produced:)
To preface this excerpt: my story is about a time I thought my mom had gotten taken away & murdered. Don’t worry, she’s fine, I just watched way too much criminal minds lol!!
My throat felt like it was turning to cement, my eyes felt heavy with tears, and before I knew it I was in complete panic mode. My hands were shaking, I couldn’t see straight. My mom had been captured by a murderer, who at any moment, was probably going to torture her. So, like a reasonable fourteen year old whose mom was being tortured, I locked all the doors in the house and hid in the top right corner of my bed and locked myself inside.
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Suspenseful. Love the first sentence!!
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Here’s some of my story so far… this is just a draft and I want to add more personality and style to make it sound better, (like how Samone writes for example!) I am not feeling great about my writing but I want to edit a lot this week to shorten the overall story! I threw a lot of uneeded details in!!
How could something so good go so wrong? When I was around twelve years old, I was fascinated with everything Greek. Not just the Percy Jackson books like most tweens, but everything. Greek mythology, food, dance, music, and even church. I am not exactly religious, I haven’t figured out what I believe, but I still went to a small Greek orthodox church in Novato with my friend’s family for three years straight! After church every Sunday my friend Marina would have Greek dance lessons with 13 other kids my age. I loved the music that blasted from the bouzouki. I loved the traditional costumes too, especially the Cretian ones because the boys wore these white boots that reminded me of go-go boots. I was dorky back then and I used to sit in that gym and record the whole lesson on my mini i-pad. I was very obsessed. I never joined though because I felt like I would be so behind these kids that have been dancing their entire lives, despite their confidence that I’d be good at it. After a year of going to church I was even willingly dragged into also going to Greek camp in Fresno to Greek dance the summer nights away in the 110 degree weather. It was magical. I loved every second of it. On top of all this, there was my favorite part: the Greek festival during memorial day weekend. I went Friday nights after school, then I went both Saturdays and Sundays at 8 a.m. and stayed until midnight all three of those days! There were booths filled with Greek jewelry and dresses and all the Greek food you could imagine. I loved these days more than anything because I got the chance to run around with the kids I only got to see for a few hours every Sunday when they were rehearsing. But during the festival I got to watch them perform in the morning and then we got to hang out all night. I was so invested in this community that I had joined and actively participated in for three years, which is a long time for a kid to be interested in something. I still have an appreciation for the culture and the people I’ve gotten to know, but the event that took place during the last Greek festival stopped my interest and I haven’t gone back since…
and then I get into the pivotal event!!
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Want to see how this develops, and how the narrator realizes more about herself and where she is. Colleagues…..?
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I’m intrigued!! Also really good detail…
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thank you!
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Build on the visuals and voices..
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Was the event that stopped you from attending greek festivals learning about Alexander the great
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HAHA no!! That is so funny though
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I really like it! I’m interested in reading more.
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Thank you!!
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I had no idea that Greek influenced activities were present in our local area, reading your paper was refreshing because I learned something new and it made me want to learn more about it.
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Yeah when I learned about it for the first time I was very interested and it was so cool to go to Greek events! I definitely recommend checking out a Greek festival!
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In my story I mentioned my distant family and how they expressed love. I don’t fully belong to that family because of cultural, language, location differences, so I don’t really fit in, but I can sense how they loved and accepted me as best as they could when I visited.
“They showed me so much love in a way I never learned to digest. It was an unspoken love, a love that never was acknowledged plainly through words, just actions and care.“
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I like those sentences you quoted..
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I love the imagery
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My essay was hard to revise. This week I decided to rewrite it and I have been struggling. Reliving that story from my past is hard, but it is something that I need to do. I have been allowing myself to move past my trauma and understand that my life changed for the better. I am looking forward to rereading and editing it some more this week!
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Don’t be too self-pressured to revise.
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Good for you for being brave and writing about something that makes you vulnerable. I was going to use this assignment for that too, but I chickened out. I think this is so great you went there.
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thank you ❤
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I’m sure you will do great. Reliving it is hard to get all the facts straight but processing it and understanding it can help you cope with it and realize that you are so much more than your pain and memories.
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And, STRONG. WISE. PRESENT.
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Personal Essay: I wrote about the birth of our first baby since she turned 5 last week and it was a crazy moment for our family.
Justin: “Hello.” Me: “Hey Babe, so don’t freak out but I am at Labor and delivery and apparently its time to have the baby.”
Justin is generally super calm so his answer was as if I told him we are having chicken for dinner.
Justin: “Okay, so should I leave work?” Me: (getting a tad annoyed with such an obvious question) “Um yeah, I think you’re probably going to want to be here for the birth of your child.”
What is it about husbands asking the most obvious questions? Also, note to husbands: When I said don’t freak out what I really meant in girl code is please freak out so I feel better about freaking out.
*I’d love some input on writing about dialog. I feel like I could do better. Thoughts?
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Love this!
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I have never gone through birth, (except for when I was born I guess) but I love this little dialogue and I think his question is really funny. I like how you use humor and you narrate over the dialogue as it is happening
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When a new person speaks, they get a new line… and, the more dialogue the better!
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Okay! Thank you! It’s been a long time since I took a formal english course. This is the exact type of input I needed
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Of course! That’s not to say that’s the only way to do it, but it’s an accepted way. You look at other fiction and non-fict’ writers and they all have their own practice.
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I really like the dialog!! It really puts me into the moment! And how casual Justin is lol!! Good job!!
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He is very casual. He reminds me of Jenny Lawsons husband so much. I actually pictured my husband when reading about him. haha
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Agreed.
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I love the dialogue! I find myself going back and forth. And saying to myself. WTF Justin. Yes! Leave work!!!
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Heres a piece from my essay. It’s still a little bumpy and this is a feeling of mine that I have never tried to put into words before. I’m excited but sill having some difficulties haha
Any thoughts would be great:)
It’s hard to blame my dad for all of my issues because I still love him so much, and he doesn’t deserve it but it’s hard to explain it any other way. Because of an unfortunate situation, I lost a stable famiy. I lost religion. That’s what hurt the most. I was in love with the church. Now it makes me sick. Sick because our old church prays that my family will be “saved” and they pray that my dad will go to hell. I can’t support a group of people that wishes the worst for me. I respect religion, and I know that there are lots of people who would be on my side, but it leaves a bitter taste.
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There’s a lot of emotion and power in this… build on that… talk to us about this church and why they think as they do and why you see them as you do.
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Sometimes hardships give us the best material
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Yes!
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Below is a copy of a paragraph from my rough draft. Please let me know what you think, what I can add, if something sounds better, or what could be elaborated on. Don´t be easy on me!
Growing up as a big sister, or big sibling in general, I feel is a big responsibility. No one signs up for their role, and they are stuck with the rest of the offspring to take care of for eternity. Luckily, I love all of them, and we are all very close. I think that having the responsibility as a young teen to take care of my siblings at home really helped shape who I am. I feel that I am a very caring person, who is big on family, and I am appreciative that I have grown up with this way, and have such a good relationship with them all. Having my younger siblings always watching me and learning from me has pushed me to always be a better version of myself, and be a good example for my siblings, and for them to have a good role model to look up to. It brings me so much joy that they do look at me that way, and that I am someone who they want to be similar to, and do things that I have done. My sister Samantha loves to hang out with me, and look at me for advice, as she is going on her second semester at the junior college. My brother and little sister both fight over me at home, and always look for my attention and approval. Being the oldest sibling has taught me to be disciplined in life, and work for what you want, and appreciate the ones around you.
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You’re doing a lot of telling, more than showing. Great characters and realities here, but show us how they speak, and your internal thoughts while things are happening!
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I love how raw and vulnerable this is. I can’t relate but I can definitely feel the emotion.
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This is great! I’m Can you elaborate on what you did? You are an awesome role model, what did you do?
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Maybe we have to wait and read!!
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This is my a snipped of my introduction
Spending all day at the creek behind my house, feet wet, hair running wild. Not a care in the world. My younger self found comfort within nature and its creatures. I would follow the stream, under an old graphitized bridge, past the vineyards, until I reached an old fence. I remember the many scratches the metal wiring would leave on my skin each and every time I would squeeze past it. The wood that once strongly held the fence upwards was now rotten and limp. The whole scenery, that forgotten creek, spoke of nothing but decay. I didn’t have any time to worry about the dangers of being down there all alone and barefoot.
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Give us some characters!
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ON IT!!!!!
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this is a snippet* sorry for the typoooo
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I must read more, I love the detail and how you describe the setting with different senses..brilliant
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Totally agree with Ryan here!!
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well I think my essay came along pretty good and flowed out of me easier than most of my other writing has. while writing i felt pretty good and got some messages I want across. though I really enjoyed my introduction paragraph I made which Ill share with yall because it helps make my more gritty story a little lighter and personally thats how I like to write. so here it is.
Introduction:
“Buckle up because this whole story for at well least me, its gonna be a wild ride down memory lane from memories I have tried to forget. Though overall this story also shaped who I am today from this experience it made me hate confrontation and people who would rather resort to violence first before trying to talk things out piss me off. So pretty much it made me a person who will resort to fighting or violence as a last last resort option because it is dumb and barbaric and God gave us these brains for a reason dammit! Heh even though I’m agnostic but people can believe whatever they want as long as it doesn’t harm others in the process. This was one dumb weird rambling but who cares this is my story I’m gonna write how I want dammit! That line made me laugh a little bit sorry furthermore let’s get on with the real nitty-gritty of my story now. Please enjoy.”
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This is wonderful. I feel like I can understand your personality through just one paragraph!
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Reading this made me very curious and a little hungry for further organized explanation.
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“It was one particular scarring night at one of my mother’s abusive ex-boyfriend’s houses. This one was particularly bad. This one would if I annoyed him even a little bit force me to sleep outside on the porch at night and if my mom tried to help me beat the hell out of her. Which is insane already, though let’s continue. This night though the abusive man named Patrick, oh yeah gross name, right? Yeah because of him I can’t ever trust or be friends with men named Patrick now. Thanks, asshole! Well I got let back inside around one in the morning that night I got put outside at around nine o’clock that night and I really don’t even remember what I did, I might have been ten at the time If I remember correctly so it could have been for some different reasons but he treated me like a dog essentially, or he would steal my mom’s money right out of her purse at night and I would see because it was in the kitchen and the back yard porch has a great view. I was outside a lot if you could tell, it was cold and I got sick a lot because of it.”
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Powerful, persuasive.
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Explanation, as well as movement in the narrator’s thoughts..
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Keep writing, and keep expanding..
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of course I shall it even went onto five pages because of how easily this story came out of me so if i go into it more in depth i can defiantly make it a page or two longer
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Sounds like you kind of wrote your essay with a sort of thesis in that intro paragraph, which I probably should’ve done haha. Good job setting it all up though. I don’t what your gonna say, but you introduce whatever it is pretty well I think
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It all started on July 17th, 1987 in Santa Rosa, California. I wish I knew my birth stats. Weight, length and time of arrival. But I don’t. I do know I was born with meth in my system. My biological mother knew she was pregnant because her drink would get condensation on the glass. That was very unlike her. Both of my parents struggled with addiction. And children were the unfortunate consequence. I was the second child in my family. Both of us destined for a lifetime of emotional instability and lacking fundamental coping mechanisms. Let’s begin, shall we?
Childhood
When I tell people my earliest childhood memory, was when I unintentionally drank hydrogen peroxide, there are tons of questions. “How did it taste”? “Was it good”? “Did you go back for seconds”? “Where were your fucking parents”?
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I really like this, it is raw and vulnerable and you’re keeping it personal. I want to read the rest of it. I am sorry that your parents were the way they were. Your writing is seriously fantastic.
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Yes…. the pain gives way to poise and authority in the writing.
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Thank you! Spoiler alert! My story is about hope and resilience. So, out of pain comes productivity.
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Yes!!
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Love the organization and tone in this… can’t wait to read the whole thing!
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I would really like to read your whole story, not just because of how awesome you are at telling stories, but because you are an amazing example to kids who come from environments similar to yours. You should tell your story more and be so proud.
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If you send me your email. I’ll totally share with you!
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ashlynemclean@gmail.com
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Love the tone. I can tell this one is powerful!
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Me as well, and the rushed structure and sensibility of the writing makes it all the more romantic and convincing…
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For my essay im unsure what lead me to this conclusion but I wonder if someone could help me elaborate on it. This is my concluding paragraph:
I feel as though I’m a cockroach. I’ll let you think about that for a minute. Okay, you ready for my weird logical reason for why im a cockroach? Because they are indestructible. Those little pests have been alive since the time of the dinosaurs, I think. They are the most adaptable pests on earth. I feel as though I could survive a nuclear explosion or bomb. I have learned to adapt to my surroundings just like those pests do. At one point in my life, I felt as though I was a headless chicken running around trying to figure out why everything was so dark. Now I’ve come to the realization that I am a cockroach and do not need my head in order to survive.
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I LOVE the analogy of a cockroach! Such a cool twist!
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Yes… odd and lovely praise.
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Thank you! I know It’s strange but I like strange.
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I absolutely love this comparison. It’s slightly humorous, you manage to speak with your audience, and continue to use imagery I can vividly picture! well done!
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I hoped my audience is able to pick up on the dark humor. Thank you !
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Not a “common” association of a cockroach but it makes so much sense!
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Want to read more, see where this is going..
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Build on visuals and voices!!
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Here’s my paragraph.
For that year, Katy Perry was just a bit more relevant then, especially amongst a bunch of middle schoolers. The movie “The Dictator ” was still fresh on every kid’s mind, so images of Kim Jong Un being exploded to the chorus of “Firework” blaring in the background was definitely a hip sentiment, one that was safe by middle school standards to appreciate, and not have to worry about being viewed upon negatively by your peers, like you wouldn’t be able to tell what comedy was if it was a helicopter blowing up in your face. My costume was therefore, naturally, Katy Perry. Technically homemade, it came complete with a bright blue wig and cupcake training bra, along with short booty shorts that I’m sure I got everyone’s attention with. The teachers, needless to say, would not end up appreciating my, what I’m assuming they thought to be, tasteless choice of costume. These were the days of school where I used to get sent home for wearing tank tops because it violated some dress code that probably said something like, “we can’t trust parents today to not let their preteen daughters out of the house with so little clothing it looks they aren’t wearing pants, so we have to enforce these rules for them. This goes for boys as well, cuz’ preteen boys can also look promiscuous, y’know.” God forbid someone sees me in my tank top and witnesses all of that exposed flesh; all of my arm, and even my other arm too. So I did my strut, (like a slut, and a pretty flirtatious one, if I do say so myself) across the runway, just like all the other kids. Except not all of the other kids did a strut, and most of them weren’t sluts. Most.
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This is so intriguing, and I would love to read more. I also really like the commentary throughout the whole piece
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I agree!
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I really like your writing!
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This is so great oh my gosh! i’m laughing
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This is epic
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Yep, this is a work of art.
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Witty and engaging… want to meet some other characters!
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Today I went to the pet store to buy meal worms for my bearded dragon. We got a feeder which is a dish with holes in the bottom so they crawl out slowly. It was really funny to watch her try to figure this out.
PS sorry for the late post I had problems logging into my account.
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A paragraph from my story:
Eating glitter makes you a fairy. Somehow I got the idea that eating glitter would make me a fairy. Maybe it was because one of my many fairy books told me that glitter was fairy dust. This is probably not the best thing to put in a children’s book, people. I had these two friends at the time, Betsy and Emma, who also loved fairies. So of course I let them in on the secret that glitter was actually fairy dust. And from that we all came up with the idea that if we ate glitter it would turn us into fairies or some bullshit like that. So on a playdate we all snuck down to my room and each ate a sprinkle of fairy dust. And much to my surprise, NOTHING HAPPENED. So of course my smart brain goes ‘I didn’t eat enough fairy dust for it to work. If I eat more I will get fairy powers’. So I went on the hunt for a big container of glitter and asked my mom to open it. When she came downstairs and found me eating the glitter she was not happy.
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omg that is great
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WOW, this reminds me of the time Maddie and I ate an Icepack because it was pink and had Strawberry shortcake (the character) on it so we thought it would taste like strawberries!!!…
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Hahahahaha
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Funny and intriguing… looking forward to reading this one! Colleagues??
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This is the best! Just this first paragraph has me wanting more and that first sentence alone made me laugh! Great job getting the readers attention.
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This is AMAZING!!!!!
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Maybe add in what the glitter tasted like. What was your train of thought while consuming it? Does glitter dry your throat? Does it give you cottonmouth?
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Great idea! Or even the texture? Maybe play or elaborate the description more?
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Ha ha.. yeah!
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Regarding my story, I want my readers to understand that some events in our childhood do not and will not define who we are as individuals. Sharing your story to those who love and care about you is a step towards self-healing Your story matters and you deserve support. You are not alone.
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❤ So much truth to this! Love it!
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This is the next paragraph after my previous post made last week, I added the last sentence of that prevous paragraph down below.
It wasn’t soon after that my “boss” became my boyfriend.
I’m not the first person to ever date a coworker, weirdly enough there were actually a lot of couples who have met each other through working at Target and there were even couples who were also in my position, a sales associate dating an assistant manager. Now this was way different than calling out sick, the backlash was hard to handle at first. Immediately they had him switch positions so he wasn’t overseeing my department and they altered both our schedules to make sure that he wasn’t the closing manager when I was working. A few coworkers really had it out for me, spreading rumors that I was only using him and that our relationship wouldn’t last, well jokes on you because we are coming up to our three year anniversary! In addition, one coworker in particular who highly disliked my boyfriend, used our relationship as an excuse for why he should get fired just because I occasionally sat at his desk during my lunch.
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Great details and little transitions here…
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I love the Target gossip. So glad you and your boyfriend made it through the gossip and BS.
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So this is my last paragraph from my story, which is about me having depression in the seventh grade. Going back to this story and talking about it is difficult because It was a scary moment in my life and I also don’t want anyone to think I am seeking sympathy. Anyways, this is the final paragraph of my story.
This is a perfect topic to write about in honor of mental health awareness month. Thankfully, I no longer struggle with these feelings but when I did all I could think about was what was wrong with me, why do I feel this way, and when am I going to be back to my normal self? I know that people struggle with mental health in all different ways and at different intensities, so it’s important to raise awareness for the people who are struggling deep down but keep it to themselves and to check in on people, even if they seem happy. I wanted to share this story so If someone who reads it is struggling with mental health, I want them to know that there is hope and there is help out there because I was so young when this happened to me and I was scared to speak up and honestly had no idea what was going on and how I felt towards my life anymore. But, I want people to know that they aren’t alone and that I know it is a scary thing to experience, but that things can get better. We need to speak up, raise awareness, and check on the people close to us.
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This is a really nice closing paragraph ❤
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Thank you:)
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This will help many people, I’m sure.
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I can’t love this enough. ❤
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Thanks for the kind words here toward one of your colleagues, Samone..
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I want my story to allow my readers to understand that events/your past does not define you. My story is something that at the time I believed was the worst thing to happen to me, now that it has been a couple of years I realize that the chain of events following my story has changed my life. I want readers to understand that life is short and things will change. If they seem bad in the moment they will get better one way or another.
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What are some of the more exciting dimensions to writing about yourself? Some of the challenges?
It’s exciting to write about funny or interesting things about my life because I like sharing those kinds of stories. It is very challenging to write about more serious events because it can be easy to either over exaggerate the story or to make it not seem as big as it was. It can be hard to be completely honest.
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That can be tricky, I agree..
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For me it is hard to write about myself with out reliving the moments. Some things are just weird to write about for me and I don’t want to relive somethings.
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It can feel awkward or uncomfortable. I like to look at that particular situation and see what I learned or what it taught me. The uncomfortable ones can make the best stories.
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Good point. I will keep that in mind!!
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Just an outside perspective!! ❤
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I never thought that one of my assignments for an English class would be writing about myself. I don’t really talk too much about my personal life so taking the time to write about a story in my life was different. It was hard to be real and transparent with myself. Reflecting and telling how I truly felt at the moment. I kind of like telling my story, it let me feel good to talk about something not too many people know about/
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Talking is NOT the same as writing..
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Trying to catch up on all the comments… FYI
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Same-zies!
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I don’t typically write about stories in my life but rather small daily thoughts and such in my journal. So, it’s been quite exciting to find how my voice flows throughout my narration. I kept finding myself being witty, which surprised me. It was challenging to write about things with my dad that happened in my past with an optimistic approach but it felt very refreshing to find light in those experiences.
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That is how one self-educates themselves..
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I think one of the more challenging parts when it comes to writing your story could be that you tell it wrong. I love to write about the stories in my life and to be able to take the time to reminisce back on life, and to think about the detail of my story. But, sometimes I feel like I have so much passion, so many things to say, but I have a hard time putting the passion and emotion onto the page, and making my reader feel what I feel.
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I feel the same way.
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I really enjoy writing stories from my life and about myself because of how free your writing can be that’s the most exciting part for me because most times when I’m writing I feel compelled to follow more of the regular rules you see but when it’s my story no one can tell me what to say or what angle i should take its all up to me. though that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have its own fair of challenges because you have to really think about what you want to say and if you have a message you want the audience or readers to learn you may have to take a deeper look into your own writing to make sure that happens that’s probably the most challenging thing for me at least.
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Freedom is part of the objective, for sure.
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Something I enjoy about writing my own story, or writing about myself is the time for reflection. There is something really cathartic about trying to remember specific details of specific moments. It can be very therapeutic. Also, life is just so darn busy these days. Having time to sit down and remember really important moments is a really good thing. I am working to make it more routine.
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I am looking forward to writing my birthing stories since I read yours! I never would have thought about writing my own. It has been very therapeutic. I told my old man that I was missing something. I definitely think writing was it.
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Totally with you on the reflection. There was a part when I was writing about how my dad taught me how to body surf and it kind of reminded me that I have a kinda cool dad…. hahah
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That sounds amazing! Love on your dad! He’s not around forever! Seems like a cool guy.
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Yeah you do!
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It’s exciting to write about some of my frustrations about working in retail and release some of that much needed steam that has been boiling up these past three years. But I’m having challenges with creating a storyline and not just rampaging about everything I hate about Target. I’m trying to focus on recalling specific incidents that has occurred and avoid listing.
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I cannot even imagine working retail right now. I’ll be sending you some good ju-ju!!!! ❤
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Don’t think to hard about “storyline”. Just relay truth.
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I agree, not ranting is hard, especially when you’re just trying to get everything out.
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Writing down parts of the story anyway has always helped me recall that stuff that I can’t remember. I also write down stuff “in the moment” or at least a little after it happens. I bet target doesn’t allow your phone at work, but it’s pretty easy to sneak it out and like use some “note” app or whatever to jot a few words real quick to remember it for later.
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Yes!!
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Maybe consider expanding your story beyond target. You can write about what is happening outside of your work life too!!
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I think one of the more exciting parts of writing about yourself is just being able to already have the overarching story already in your head naturally, so it really does allow you to rush through the words as fast as you can, without having to worry about plot discrepancies. It’s hard though because you still have to make sure that others can understand you story, even though to you it’s a no-brainer.
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Like this perspective, Jacob. Cheers.
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For tonight’s page…. Writing about yourself should take you away from you, to an extent. You’re writing about the past Mike, or Harmony, or Samone, or Maddie, Skyler… Writing ABOUT them, trying to understand them better. Even as the author, you have NO right judge a past You. Evaluate and study, yes.. but judge, NO. Just a thought…
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I struggle with organizing my ideas. I start to go into detail about something and forget what I’m actually writing about.
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I relate, sometimes I will be writing and then I will go off on a tangent and forget what my focus was.
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Many people do! Organization is a battle that has a hard time ending..
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I want my readers to understand my perspective and experiences on acceptance and i want them to enjoy the imagery and personal meaning behind my writing. Mainly I want the reader to listen and understand me but also take it for themselves if possible.
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One aspect about writing my moments and parts of my life is where I put attention. Do I give Mom more attention, or my sister…. Dad…. what should get the emphasis. I shouldn’t be thinking about that too much, just wanted to share one of my challenges with you all.
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An issue I’m having right now is that I can’t tell my story without making my dad the center of attention although I think that my mom is the one who deserves the spotlight
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I think that was something I struggled with when writing my story. Much of what I wrote about was the things my dad has done, but I didn’t emphasize him as a person. I rather chose to highlight my mom as an active character!
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Key is, to not overthink it.
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